Far Behind. . .

Well hurray for not making deadlines!

I know, I know. I promised wonderful little embroidered goodies for sale on Etsy by 2/20/10. It is now 3/9/10. I am fully aware of this.

I am close though. In fact I'm off all week for Spring Break and I plan on working on nothing but Etsy stuff. And, you know, homework. I guess that's important too.

But, on the bright side, I have a new computer!!! I'm working on getting Photoshop so I can edit and put together some embroidery patterns I've been working on. It's gonna be pretty awesome.


Now on to the craft porn!

Those of you who found me through the ever-fabulous Craftster have probably already seen this.



And this:



Well, they will both be for sale soon! In addition to a "Rugrats" version I'm finishing up and an "Alvin and the Chipmunks" version I have in mind.

And, for a real teaser, here is a sample of some of the patterns I'm working on.



Remember, that's just a teaser and very, very far from what I plan on the finished product looking like, but it gives you an idea.

And now I'm off to stitch and watch "The View." Apparently today they are going to detail the history of the Menstrual Cycle [no joke] and explain why cramps "are actually a good thing!" <---[a very excited, very male announcer made this bold claim.]

I am not convinced, male voice of "The View." I don't think anyone with a vagina is.

coming soon. . .

. . .to an etsy near you.

"If it's the ultimate game, how come they're playing it again next year?"

It's that time of year kids: Superbowl. A time of junk food overdoses where television ads are treated like cinematic masterpieces. I've already read several opinions on how this year's game will all go down, but quite frankly, I really don't care. I'm a Bears fan.

Therefore, I don't give one hot damn how this game plays out so long as, when it's all said and done, the Colts lose. Yep, I'm voting Saints all the way. Before you even so much as think about it, let me explain.

I dislike Peyton Manning. It's not because he's won and I think someone else deserves a shot. It's not because he's a lilty-voiced uber-dork. It's not because he's sold his sole to Oreos [I actually enjoy those commercials quite a lot, though Eli is clearly funnier simply because he seems so surprised by the fact that he is, in fact, speaking.]

It is because he looks like a fucking alien.

EX:


Just check this shit out! His head, for one, is enormous. Not to mention how bulbous it looks. Next, we see that there is no clear distinction, in terms of size or shape, between his head and neck. Is his neck enormous or are his jowls swollen? Is he part of a race of giant chipmunk people?

But wait, there's more. In fact, I'm just getting to the best part.

HE HAS NO SHOULDERS!!! His neck just slowly tapers off and becomes his arms without any indication of a joint connecting them.

See, this is how he has gone undetected for so long. The people on his planet, or as they shall henceforth be known in this blog, The People of the Deficient Shoulders [POTDS] sent him here to infiltrate our kind but he knew people would spot his definitionless upper extremities almost instantly. So he did the only thing he could: become an NFL quarterback. Guaranteed lifetime supply of shoulder pads. It's genius really.

But he didn't fool everyone. The truth was out there all along, I'm just the only one willing to see it.

So this year, as you watch the Superbowl, remember what it feels like not to be part of a race enslaved by shoulder-less aliens because if the Colts win, no one can be certain that isn't what we're headed for.



We'll have to do all their heavy lifting. Just sayin'. . .

Got some canvas stretchers for mounting John Wayne. Now I just need to finish him up.

This wood grain is killing me!!!

I found my Spirograph!!!



I'm puppy-sitting for my boyfriend's sister and her dog, Bella, had to get involved

Here's a scan of the progress I've made on my John Wayne portrait. It's still not quite done yet, but it's getting there. I spent several hours on it today while I was home from work. Unfortunately, I was home because I threw my back out and was physically unable to find a comfortable position to sit/lay/stand, so stitching was terribly unpleasant. Oh well, such is life.



I'm actually really, really happy with it so far. I'd even venture to say it's the best piece I've done so far. If you wanna see any detail whatsoever your best bet is to click on the picture.

Oh, and I have a good shot at showing this off to Chicago artist Tony Fitzpatrick tomorrow. I'm super excited.

And now for something completely different. . .

The Duke!






Obviously still in progress.